Matty Knight: I'm sorry for being 'stupid'
The Pick and Roll managed to get a copy of the Matthew Knight letter to Travis Trice. Here it is in full copy:
Thanks to your way over-the-top reaction to my little ball-to-head tap, I was suspended for two games yesterday! Two games? There was nothing in it though mate. You know that right?
I know you probably don't care because you bunch o' snakes lost, but us BIG hairy wildcats are in the Grand Final man. I was ready to knock down mid-range jumpers and dance in the paint all night long.
Maybe if you didn't flop and weren't so dainty and petite and were just a bit more like me and big Angus B, you know, big brutish hairy...ummm what's the word? MEN. Yeh, if you were more like a man, you barely would have noticed me dishing out one of the all-time great, psych-out fakes in NBL history and I wouldn't have to write this lov...ummmm, this apology letter.
It was all-time though right? C'mon, you know it!!
Here it is...Whoah, no it isn't!! I've still got it...What? Hey Little Travie... what are you doing on the floor?
Hahahahaha dude it was so good hey? Do you think I should audition for Space Jam 2? I reckon I've got the chops to hold my own. I reckon you should too actually; you conned everyone with that fall.
But Trav, why did you have to push me like that after I duked you out of your shoes? That really hurt my feelings a bit. It probably hurt me far more than what I did to you. I've got this little scratch on one of my guns! I mean, I was just playing a little bit, but you nearly killed me. Then your little buddies Worthy and Eggnog got involved...
Look, I'm sorry man. I'm truly sorry for my behaviour. It was in the heat of the moment and I just wasn't thinking clearly. I apologise to you, the NBL, the Taipans, the fans and to anybody that I've offended or caused harm to with my thoughtless actions.
Anyway, I know you're probably working on trimming your facial hair about now, or maybe watching those awesome replays of my mad skills. Does yours grow yet? Mine only takes a couple of hours. Anyway, wish me luck in the granny.
Your new best friend
PS: Is it PS or NB?
PPS: If it's PPS? Would that make it NBN then? Hahaha! LOL! I crack me up.
But seriously Travie... Did you want to contribute some money to pay this fine? I know you probably feel pretty bad about it, yeh?
A couple of G's should cover it. Let me know. See ya, mate.